Last night after the kids had already
been put to bed Palmer comes back out and climbs in my lap. He said
“Mama, What happens if I forget what Nana was like? Am I going to
remember her when I get bigger like Pierce?” As the tears started
to swell in his little eyes, my eyes did too. How do you answer
something like that? I looked over to Christopher for an
answer.....he didn't have one either.
I'm not sharing this looking for a pity
party or for people to tell me that they are praying for us but to
share how grief really impacts people. I think until losing my Mama I
always like a lot of others tried to put a time limit on grief but
you can't. Losing Raegan hurt but losing my Mama has been a different
kind of hurt. My heart literally aches and there are times that I
feel like the waves of life are crashing in around me and grief
covers my soul. I can be taking a shower and remember something and I
start to cry uncontrollably. I'm not used to not being in control.
After I held Palmer last night and
cried with him and explained to him that I would do my very best to
help him remember everything about his Nana it made me want to search
for scripture about grief. So here's what I found and I felt lead to
share because there might be someone hurting just as much as we are
right now but they are scared to speak up and if you know me then you
know I'm not scared to speak up ;)
2 Corinthians 1:3-11
3 Praise
be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of
compassion and the God of all comfort, 4 who
comforts us in all our troubles, so that we can comfort those in
any trouble with the comfort we ourselves receive from God. 5 For
just as we share abundantly in the sufferings of Christ, so also
our comfort abounds through Christ. 6 If
we are distressed, it is for your comfort and salvation; if we
are comforted, it is for your comfort, which produces in you patient
endurance of the same sufferings we suffer. 7 And
our hope for you is firm, because we know that just as you share in
our sufferings, so also you share in our comfort.
8 We
do not want you to be uninformed, brothers and sisters,[a] about
the troubles we experienced in the province of Asia. We
were under great pressure, far beyond our ability to endure, so that
we despaired of life itself. 9 Indeed,
we felt we had received the sentence of death. But this happened that
we might not rely on ourselves but on God, who raises the
dead. 10 He
has delivered us from such a deadly peril, and he will deliver
us again. On him we have set our hope that he will continue to
deliver us, 11 as
you help us by your prayers. Then many will give thanks on
our behalf for the gracious favor granted us in answer to the prayers
of many.
After reading this passage what a great
and comforting thought that our comfort comes from the only one who
can comfort us in times that we don't understand. I am thankful for
the promise of eternal life even when my earthly mind can't
comprehend what joys await us in Heaven!
 |
| Hate this picture turned out fuzzy but this was taken the night before Mama died. |
